You just got into medical school – hooray! Now you must be wondering who your fellow classmates are. More specifically, what kind of guys will you find wandering around your esteemed campus? Here are 7 types of guys that you’d almost always encounter during your 4-year stay:
1. The Neurotic Worrier
Medical school is stressful enough. Add 160 pounds of jittery, OCD-prone, neurotic man and you have a recipe for disaster. The Neurotic Worrier gets on everyone’s nerves. He constantly complains about all assignments and readings. He double-checks, then triple-checks his work and attributes all his accomplishments to pure luck. This guy rarely sleeps and his diet consists of Red Bull, coffee, and a healthy dose of Adderall. You’ll find him lurking among the deepest recesses of the library consulting his best friend Robbins.
2. The Backstabbing, No-Good, Gunner
If you thought the Neurotic Worrier was bad, then you’re really in for a treat. The Backstabbing, No-Good, Gunner (BNGG) is quite possibly the worst person on campus. He’ll pretend to be your friend, then steal your notes and sabotage your work for personal gain. The BNGG cares about 3 letters only: AOA. He’ll do whatever it takes to honor every single rotation and match into dermatology/neurosurgery/(insert impossibly competitive specialty here). Luckily, BNGG’s are few in number and tend to reside in individualized territories — usually marked by barbed wire and hazardous material warning signs.
3. The Golden Boy
The Golden Boy (aka Mr. Awesome) is made up of the stuff from dreams. He is ridiculously good-looking, pathologically nice and everybody’s best friend. His patients love him and his classmates idolize him. You will try to find his flaws and you will most definitely fail. Some say he can cure cancer with just his smile, but that hasn’t been reproduced by clinical trials yet. Look out for the golden boy because he’s clearly winning in life; might as well hitch along for the ride!
4. The John Doe
Who is the John Doe? Well, I have absolutely no idea! He’s that random, unrecognizable guy you see during some exam in your third year. Apparently he’s part of your class but nobody knows who he really is. The John Doe is a very average-looking individual who magically blends into his surroundings. Nevertheless, he’ll matriculate and graduate with you — only to disappear once again.
5. The Bro
The Bro usually makes his trumpeted appearance during the first week of medical school orientation. Normally clad in his fraternity sleeveless tanks, the Bro vehemently believes that he is still in college. He’ll definitely be at every medical school party and actively seeks out like-minded individuals to form “the herd.” When a Bro herd is formed, prepare for rampant debauchery, copious amounts of alcohol and significant property destruction. Party hardy!
6. The Pro
The Pro (not to be confused with the Bro) is a magnificent, unrivaled physical specimen. He played multiple NCAA sports in college and has a trophy stash to prove it. The Pro is an athlete-turned-physician and seeks to make his imprint on the world as a renowned orthopedist. You’ll usually find him jogging around campus at 6AM and winning all of the intramural sports. He hits the gym like clockwork and never misses leg day.
7. The Family Man
Perhaps the most underrated guy in medical school, the Family Man is truly a champion. He somehow manages to balance a marriage and children with life as a medical student. He is the loving father who often holds First Aid in one hand and a diaper in another. Although usually absent from most school social functions, the Family Man makes guest appearances every now and then, much to the delight of his peers.
Medical school guys come in all sorts of flavors and sizes. But all may become full-fledged physicians. Look around and see if you can recognize some of them!Joshua Liu is a part-time medical student and full-time escapist. He blogs regularly at Young Doc Blog, where he doles out useful tips for needy medical students.